Jon Fish's Political Blog

The End Draws Nigh

2006-04-06T00:09:00.000-04:00

Well you may have noticed I haven't updated in awhile. The fact of the matter is that with getting ready for graduation, researching and visiting grad schools, getting ready to move, trying to finish up class, and everyhting else in between, I just haven't had time.

In light of this, I've decided to go ahead and call it quits here. I just don't have the time necessary to put myself whole-heartedly into the effort, and I certainly don't want to only do something halfway.

But don't worry, I'm still keeping my personal blog regularly over at MySpace, and I'll keep posting interesting politics and news items over there as I find them. But for now, I suppose this is the end of things over here.

It's been fun,
~Peace out
Jon

I'm a national news magnet

2006-03-14T16:12:00.000-05:00

Alright, time for some good old fashioned narcissism.

For the third time in my career with The Daily Beacon, I've garnered national attention with my work.

Today we got an e-mail in the newsroom from The Nation, America's oldest weekly news magazine and one of the most popular, letting us know that my most recent column, "Bushisms Stupify Columnist," would be republished on their website.

She wrote:

Dear John:
We’re writing to let you know that The Nation, America's oldest weekly magazine, has linked to one of your articles, "'Bushisms' Stupefy Columnist,” from our new student webpage at www.thenation.com/student.

We will be maintaining a daily newsfeed that highlights student journalism and events taking place on campuses across the country.
...

Best regards,
Habiba Alcindor
__________
Habiba Alcindor
Communications Coordinator
The Nation

And sure enough, when I got home and looked it up, there I was:

I'm just kinda like, "Wow." I always am when this happens. I never really ever set out to get people's attention like that, and when it happens I'm just blindsided by it.

UPDATE: I just got a response to the e-mail I sent them thanking them for their compliments. She wrote me back, saying:

Your column was funny and I liked the approach you took of assembling the bushisms into a fictitious interview-- it added a new twist. A good piece to capture the impeachy mood of our web visitors.
Cheers,
Habiba
__________
Habiba Alcindor
Communications Coordinator
The Nation

I like the word 'impeachy,' I'm gonna have to use that someday.

And to think, all I was gonna do was come home today and say "Best. Headline. EVER!" Beacuse it really was. It even beat out my former favorite headlines, "No 'gay agenda' hiding in closet," and "Pasta now credible creator."

Sigh, I hate for him to be kinda riding the coattails of this fun stuff, but I just wanna say as an aside that I LOVE Eric Moore's cartoons. He is absolutely hilarious. Todays "Tailybones" had to be one of the funniest things ever, check it out:

Alright, I guess that's about enough. Time to get back to work I suppose. Until later, all.

March Madness!

2006-03-13T09:16:00.000-05:00

Check out this March Madness tournament of the "biggest threats to progressive values" and find out who the real axis of evil is.

Hat Tip to R.Neal

Apparently nobody likes him

2006-03-08T16:57:00.000-05:00

More than half of Tennesseans don't want another Bush in '08

This result comes from a recent MTSU-led public opinion poll conducted by phone to 626 random people in the state.

Here's some other stats from the poll:

-Bush's TN approval rating: 42%. This time last year his approval rating was 55%.
-58% of Tennesseans don't want the Bush leadership style in the next president
-Only 35% of Tennesseans want a Bush-like president in '08
-One fourth rate the war in Iraq as the number one problem for the country (a problem which Bush created from nothing). The economy (another Bush created problem) came in second at 12%
-Only 31% of Tennesseans are satisfied with the direction the nation is headed in. 63% are dissatisfied.
-Bush has even lost support among evangelical Christians, falling from 62% last year to 48% this year.

Wow, when you lose your base in the Bible Belt, you must be doing something wrong. I sure hope for his sake the interim elections go well for the Republicans, or these last two years of his are gonna be a nightmare.

-Hat tip to Michael Silence

Creepy

2006-03-06T14:44:00.000-05:00

State bill proposes Christianity be Missouri's official religion

Now, I know I should cut them some slack, what with most politicians being inherently dumber than the average citizen anyway combined with being from Missouri and therefore not being educated enough to be able to read the Bill of Rights, but this is damned scary.

Like a virgin...

2006-02-28T00:34:00.000-05:00

New surgery to restore hymen

You've got to be kidding. Its things like people who waste $5,000 to have their hymens restored only to have them broken again that make me hate plastic surgery even more.

Now, I can rationalize, even empathize, with being overweight and seeing no viable escape (though I found a way by not eating so damn much), and I've read tons of research about body image and self-esteem and the deleteirous psychological effects of having small breasts, being overweight, or having a cosmetic physical defect can have on people, especially women, and I sympathize.

But this is just too damn much. Let's look at some choide excerpts from this lovely article:

Women have resorted to backstreet hymen repair for centuries in religions and cultures in which marrying as a virgin is sacred and losing your “maidenhead” before matrimony can mean shame, or even being put to death. But an increasing number of women such as Mrs Yarborough are now electing to be “revirginised” using modern techniques as a purely cosmetic or lifestyle choice, to “put the sparkle” back into their marriage or give their husband a surprise on the second honeymoon. They usually opt also to have one of the new “designer vagina” procedures, such as tightening up of the vaginal canal slackened by childbirth, or the cosmetic trimming of enlarged labia.

That's a good reason to waste $5,000, either to decieve your religious authorities (no to mention the person you supposedly love and intend to marry) whom you've openly defied, or to give what has to be the most transitory of presents that I can possibly think of.

And I absolutely love the notion of "designer vaginas." Since when did the everyday vagina become banal? Call me a traditionalist, but I get creeped out by funny shaving designs; I don't know what to think about a "designer vagina."

“I have affluent upper-class ladies coming in from Manhattan, getting ready for a second-honeymoon cruise or something like that. Or some women had a disappointing time the first time they were deflowered and now they have found someone special they would really like to give it up to,” says Dr Marco Pelosi, a gynaecologist and plastic surgeon who has a specialist clinic in Bayonne, New Jersey. He performs ten hymenoplasties a month. “Ninety per cent of them are for women who are in big trouble if they do not appear to be a virgin when they get married. Then there are the small number who just want it done,” he says. For six to 12 weeks after the operation the woman cannot have sex or exercise vigorously while she heals up. Then she is ready to return, in a flash of additional pain, to her deflowered state. “Thousands of dollars, and it lasts a few seconds. People think it’s crazy but to my patients it does not matter. It means such a lot to them,” says Pelosi.

I love the word. "Hymenoplasties." I've got another word to describe the procedure: "Mutilation." Tattoos can be attractive, piercings are, and they are often described with similar terminology. But at least people with these "mutilations" don't hide them. This procedure is all about deception - being something you arent.

"Thousands of dollars, and it lasts a few seconds."

Exactly. That same thousands of dollars could feed or clothe someone stricken by poverty for months, but no, lets have a hymenoplasty instead.

One doctor in Connecticut markets extensively in magazines and on the internet to British clients, offering international vaginal makeover packages that include flight, limousine transfer, hotel — and hymenoplasty. Most clients are Latin Americans, Saudi brides-to-be or British Muslims who fly in to be surreptitiously revirginised before marriage. But there is also a growing demand for “recreational” hymenoplasty. Indeed, it ’s now so common at two New York clinics that the price has dropped to $1,800 (£1,029).

Talk about Extreme Makeover. Here's a proposition: if you can't live up to your religious ideals, then you probably don't need to be a member of that religion. There's a reason I don't practice institutionalized religion.

Hymenoplasty is not licensed by any official plastic surgery or gynaecological association, it is not officially taught and it is so new and on the fringe that there are only anecdotal statistics. All the operations are done privately and paid for in full by the individual.
...
Dr Leonore Tiefer, a New York sexologist, has a different concern — that women are allowing surgeons to dive in with intimate surgery that has not been officially researched or tested, either physically or psychologically. “When it is ‘the new thing’ with very little data available, how do people know it is OK? No approval is needed, such as is required for a new drug. To do a novel surgery you just have to have the idea. We are now seeing people who had other “novelties” such as Botox and penis enlargement surgery coming in with irreversible damage,” she said.

Mmm, safe and fun for the whole family.

“Sometimes their husband left them for someone younger, prettier and tighter,” he (a male gunecologist and plastic surgeon who performs the procedure) says.

How fucking shallow can this guy get? If a man leaves a woman because she's not young or as sexually attractive as she used to be (i.e. she aged like every other person on the planet, heaven forbid), then is that someone that woman really wants to be involved with?

I feel bad for these women. I feel bad in general that women are socialized in such a way that they feel they must do everything possible to be physically attractive, even to the point of self-mutilation. This type of surgery just reinforces the same body image problems that cause anoerxia, bulimia, teenage depression, anxiety, and a host of other psychological traumas.

It's tragic, and it's getting scary.

Have they no shame?

2006-02-25T14:02:00.000-05:00

It seems that there truly is no rationality at Fox News. There is no sense of human decency or humility in the dank, infested waters where Bill O'Reilley gathers the waste and decay of the media and burrows inside the long-dead carcass of objective reporting where he and his compatriots nest.

Yesterday, I posted that civil war in Iraq would be the worst possible outcome for the US intervention force. It would epitomize an absolute failure on our part to stabilize a post-war country, provide a free and democratic government, and provide for the safety of those whom we were supposedly liberating from oppression.

But yesterday, in an unprecented, unfathomable dedication to toeing the party line, Fox News argued that an Iraqi civil war could be a good thing!

I can only assume that "good thing" in Fox News's mind is that everyone over there will be dead and not plague our deific President any longer.

Have they no shame?

-Hat tip to R.Neal

We did the right thing...right?

2006-02-24T19:01:00.000-05:00

I've tried to restrain from talking about this story, hoping it might improve. But things don't look good.

New Iraq on the verge of civil war

Saddam Hussein was a terrible dictator. He did horrible things to his people and his country.

But now I just don't see how anyone can justify our intervention in Iraq anymore. The country went from relative peace and stability, to bombing and streetfighting, to daily terror attacks, and now to the verge of mutually-assured self-destruction.

Going to Iraq was wrong. It could have been defended legitimately by some before now. But not anymore. Anyone who still argues that the Iraq war was the right thing to do is just deluding themselves by ignoring the facts.

If there's one thing that can make Republicans and Democrats work together...

2006-02-23T09:48:00.000-05:00

It's George W. Bush's policies. And its usually working against him

So Bush tried to sneak the transfer of major east coast port management to a Middle Eastern business past Congress, and Congress isn't happy about it.

There are some, the White House included, that accuse opponents to the deal of being prejudiced and saying that because they're a Middle Eastern company people are opposing on terms of racial intolerance.

That's just stupid.

Now, I wouldn't put it past Bill Frist and Tom DeLay to use that as their motivation for opposition, but I think the real reason both parties in Congress are openly condemning this move is because of Bush's prediliction toward eshewing the checks and balances in the Constitution, such as Congressional oversight of Executive power.

The Bush administration tried to sneak this past Congress, and when someone finds out, it sends up a huge red flag that someone somewhere is trying to get away with something. Then today we find out that Bush had a secret agreement with the company to not have to go through the usual routine investigations or record-keeping practices required by law. This just screams that they knew something would be found if these routine investigations had occurred.

Most members of Congress are not saying "no, we will not let this company operate our ports." They're really just saying "give us time to investigate this sale and make sure it's in the best interests of our country."

Not an unreasonable request if you ask me.

Conservatives* are gonna have a hard time picking sides on this one...

2006-02-15T13:50:00.000-05:00

From the producer of "Trembling Before G-D," a documentary about homosexual jews who struggle to reconcile their faith and their sexuality (good film btw), comes "In the Name of Allah," about the same thing but with gay Muslims.

*Of course the implication isn't that all conservatives have problems with Muslims and gays, but ya certainly gotta admit the tolerance for either is much lower on the right side of this country lol.

If his mouth is open, he's spewing crazy

2006-02-14T23:18:00.000-05:00

Stacey Campfield suggests sending Democrats hunting with Dick Cheney

That's it, it's official: Stacey Campfield is batshit insane.

I don't have anyhting else to say about this guy. He's just not worth the waste in effort. If you don't know anything about him, I suggest you read this column I wrote about him last spring, and if you like that, then you'lll love this webpage that I've dedicated to him.

Update: Michael Silence has picked up the story.
Update #2: As has Andy Axel, posting on Knoxviews. Apparently he was first, actually.
So the consensus seems to be unanimous - Stacey Campfield is indeed psychotic.
Update #3: Damn, this story isn't going away, it's going national lol. Picked up by Crooks and Liars. The consensus remains the same, though...

Funny "ha-ha" or funny "ouch?"

2006-02-12T21:39:00.000-05:00

Cheney shoots fellow hunter. -Associated Press

The guy's okay, and it was an accident, so that makes it "funny ha-ha" in my opinion.

The "God" resolution is back, and creepy as ever...

2006-02-09T11:38:00.000-05:00

The God Resolution

Michael Silence reports that the "God Resolution" has been brought before the Knox County Commission yet again. For those that are unaware, this little piece of legislation says that America was founded on religious principles and should therefore administer justice and create laws congruent thereto. No specific mention is made, but Christianity is implied as the sole religion this country is based upon.

I'll let Thomas Jefferson - you know, one of the people who DID help found this country - take this one. Your thoughts Tom?

"An amendment was proposed by inserting "Jesus Christ," [into the Constitution]…the insertion was rejected by the great majority, in proof that they meant to comprehend, within the mantle of its protection, the Jew and the Gentile, the Christian and Mohammedan, the Hindoo and Infidel of every denomination."

I think we should all propose that his holiness The Flying Spaghetti Monster was the inspiration for the founding of America (and his teachings should also be taught in schools as science, too). Or perhaps the Church of the Fonz was the basis for this country (Anybody see that Family Guy? That was funny.).

Meh, who needs the First Ammendment anyway? Hell, George W. Bush and Alberto Gonzalez are already trying to do away with the Fourth, so why not toss this one out with it?

Update: The resolution has again been withdrawn. Thank...er...God.

Beacon Editorializing: 7 February

2006-02-08T10:44:00.000-05:00

Beacon Editorializing: 31 Jan.

2006-01-31T15:17:00.000-05:00

No Surprise Here

2006-01-30T11:46:00.000-05:00

Study Ties Political Leanings to Hidden Biases - Washington Post

Correlation between voting Republican and racial prejudice? Naaa, couldn't be.

Why American Democracy doesn't work anymore.

2006-01-23T12:14:00.001-05:00

It's all about the money.

Beacon Editorializing: 19 January

2006-01-19T11:21:00.000-05:00

BeaconBrief: 17 January

2006-01-17T16:33:00.000-05:00

I'm just gonna be brief here. I dunno who that good-lookin' guy is on the left today, but he's a damn good writer.

Okay, enough with that. I will say that the piece came out lookin' a little weird, though. One paragraph was moved to an entirely out of context location and there were just some very, very strange grammar and style editing choices on both our pieces today.

I think someone at the copy desk was asleep at the wheel. Or maybe drunk.

Meh, it happens. No worries. Whenever I find the time to update my website, you can see the piece as it was intended. Til then,

~Peace

Beacon Editorializing: 11 January

2006-01-11T10:50:00.000-05:00

I've decided to start a new thing where, every now and then when the Beacon opinion page is particularly interesting, I'm gonna write a review/opinion/response/whatver to the things appearing that day. As I've been on the recieving end of both praise and criticism for my works with the Beacon for two years now, I've decided to dish some out for once.

Bear in mind, though, that even if I disagree with or derride a columnist's argument, it's being done in in civil discussion and not meant to be in any way malicious. In fact, chances are good that I'm friends with most of these people. Anyway...

Now, I'd love to link the columns I'm about to comment on today, but the website hasn't been updated yet. When that happens, I'll update with the links. Til then, pick up a copy of the Beacon, jeez!

"Reexamine views in 2006" (can you tell we don't get to write our own headlines?)-Crystal Humphrey

Sigh...I love the girl, but we clearly need to have a talk. Now before I go on, I'll just tell ya that Crystal likes to call herself a centrist. Don't let her get away with it! Lol, na I'm givin' her a hard time, but you will notice she took the moderated conservative view on every issue she mentioned, even going so far as to espouse support of the pseudo-notion of extensive media bias. This is just like the idea of "judicial activism" in that the facts simply go against conservative ideology far more often than not, so instead its easier to slander them (the media and the judiciary, respectively). I've always argued that if the media looks biased, it tends to be because the right is being caught trying to screw America way more than the left. That's not to say the left doesn't do it's fair share of trying to screw us; their attempts usually just pale in comparison.

I did like what Crystal had to say about some of the events though. In talking about Katrina, she couldn't have been more right when she said "For every display of heroism and compassion, there were images of rage and opposition." I remember hoping for a meteor to strike Nancy Pelosi, Kanye West, and Michael Chertoff every time they got on TV in the weeks afterward.

And I absolutely loved the part about Terri Schivo. Bill Frist (R-TN, Medical Doctor, Senate Majority Leader, and complete tool) turned that woman into a martyr for principle, and I remember wishing that someone would martyr Bill Frist for being such a colossal, for lack of a better word, douchebag.

Then there's the Tookie thing. People keep trying to drag me into Tookie debates (damn you Pevey), but I just can't get worked up about it. I don't care about the death penalty. You can't make me care about the death penalty. It doesn't matter!

However, when cornered and forced to take a stance on the issue, I take a purely pragmatic one: what good did it do to execute him? The short answer is, well, none. In fact, we may have done him a favor. I mean if he'd had his sentence commuted, life in prison is no picnic (in fact, it's probably a lot worse if you have faith and know something better lies around the corner). Plus, there was some potential good he could have done. Since his imprisonment, it appeared that Tookie had realized the atrocities he'd committed, and had become a harsh and vitriolic critic of gang violence and the gang lifestyle. Hell, I just tend to think that if his words could have stopped one person from joining a gang, it'd have been worth it.

Then there's the standard conservative rhetoric about all the good we're doing in Iraq. My argumet to that one is well documented: does that really make up for all the bad? The thousands of dead Americans? Tens of thousands of dead Iraqis?

And what about the reason we went there in the first place? We were told that Iraq had WMDs (the republican's favorite buzzword) and that Saddam consorted with terrorists. These two reasons are very compelling reasons to go to war, because if you're a terrorist, who's on top of your hit list right now? That's right: us. We're #1! We're #1! USA! USA! It's too bad that both of these reasons, the only ones we heard til about a year after the war had begun, turned out to be patently wrong if not outright fabrications. Let's get to the heart of the matter, this war is about two things: oil and revenge; and that's why so many have died.

Unacceptable. Irreproachable. Unforgiveable.

Wow I've rambled. Moving on...

"Political labels signify little" -Scott Hendrix

I really liked this column. I fall into this category of not fitting into the standard label system. Now I won't deny my affiliation. I'm a hardcore liberal, and proud of it, but did you also know that I am a certified National Rifle Association Instructor in Rifle, Shotgun, Handgun, and Muzzleloading Rifle and Shotgun? Or that I am an Eagle Scout and still quite active in Scouting? Or that I fully endorse the expansion of nuclear power? Do those sound like liberal traits to you?
And I'm glad Im not the only one concerned about the new "tax and spend conservative" doctrine. Bill Clinton actually cut government spending by over 1%, whereas George W. Bush has increased spending by over 44% in the last 5 years. That's fiscal responsibility, let me tell you.

I'm also glad he got on the new scandals recently breaking out. Well they're not that new. I mean, this is why Nixon was ousted, after all. I've got my own piece to say about spying on Americans. Stay tuned.

Otherwise I don't have much else to say except kudos, Scott. Great piece. Well, save for the "no handguns" thing. I despise the NRA as much as the next liberal (yes, I'm aware I'm certified as an instructor by them, but they're the only ones that do it), but a handgun has legitimate defensive tool. Now if ya wanna talk assault weapons, I'm right there with ya.

Political Cartoon - Josh Schendel

Very funny. Pat Robertson is a dick and a half.

Alright, that's all for this edition I suppose. As an aside I wanna say goodbye to LaRue Cook. The former Entertainment Editor of the Beacon won an internship with Scripps Howard and had to resign to persue this opportunity. Unfortunately, now I have no one to shoot the bull with when I'm down at the Beacon. Everyone else actually does work! Sigh...ah well, good luck man!

~Peace

Stick a fork in him, he's done.

2006-01-07T13:16:00.000-05:00

Tom DeLay to officially step down as majority leader

Even his own party is turning their back on him now.

With the upcoming testimony of lobbyist Jack Abramhoff, who recently plead guilty to a myriad of fraud and conspiracy charges, and having agreed to cooperate in exposing 20 or more congressional Republicans in his schemes, DeLay included, House leaders have demanded new leadership in the hopes of saving face, being an election year and all.

DeLay still plans on running for re-election. I hope he can execute his official duties form behind bars.

Gay Marriage Is Wrong

2006-01-07T01:35:00.000-05:00

Via PVP

10 reasons Gay Marriage is wrong:
1. Being gay is not natural. And as you know Americans have always rejected unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because, as you know, a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed. The sanctity of Britany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

9 out of 10 Baptist divorcees want gays to stop undermining the sanctity of marriage...

Abramhoff pleads guilty

2006-01-03T17:50:00.000-05:00

20 Republican Members of Congress, Including Tom DeLay, face various corruption charges on Abramhoff's testimony.

Man, it's really starting to look like corruption is par for the course for Republican congressional leaders these days. Granted, Abramhoff isn't in congress, but as a lobbyist for some of the largest Republican organizations in the country, it's expected that he'll be take a couple dozen congressmen down with him, all of them with a little "R" beside the state they're from. I wonder if they put that little "R" on the mugshot photos, too.

Merry Christmas

2005-12-24T15:04:00.000-05:00

That's right, even us godless liberals can believe, too.

Luke 2, 1-20
1And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed. 2(And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.) 3And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city. 4And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:) 5To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child. 6And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered. 7And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn. 8And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. 9And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. 10And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. 11For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord. 12And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. 13And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, 14Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men. 15And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us. 16And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger. 17And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child. 18And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds. 19But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart. 20And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

The Qur'an, Sura 3 42-49

42 Behold! the angels said: "O Mary! Allah hath chosen thee and purified thee- chosen thee above the women of all nations.
43 "O Mary! worship Thy Lord devoutly: Prostrate thyself, and bow down (in prayer) with those who bow down."
44 This is part of the tidings of the things unseen, which We reveal unto thee (O Messenger.) by inspiration: Thou wast not with them when they cast lots with arrows, as to which of them should be charged with the care of Mary: Nor wast thou with them when they disputed (the point).
45 Behold! the angels said: "O Mary! Allah giveth thee glad tidings of a Word from Him: his name will be Christ Jesus, the son of Mary, held in honour in this world and the Hereafter and of (the company of) those nearest to Allah.
46 "He shall speak to the people in childhood and in maturity. And he shall be (of the company) of the righteous."
47 She said: "O my Lord! How shall I have a son when no man hath touched me?" He said: "Even so: Allah createth what He willeth: When He hath decreed a plan, He but saith to it, 'Be,' and it is!
48 "And Allah will teach him the Book and Wisdom, the Law and the Gospel,
49 "And (appoint him) an apostle to the Children of Israel, (with this message): "'I have come to you, with a Sign from your Lord, in that I make for you out of clay, as it were, the figure of a bird, and breathe into it, and it becomes a bird by Allah's leave: And I heal those born blind, and the lepers, and I quicken the dead, by Allah's leave; and I declare to you what ye eat, and what ye store in your houses. Surely therein is a Sign for you if ye did believe;

Merry Christmas, to you and all of yours.

~Peace
Jon

PS And if you're not a believier, then Happy Holidays and have a very Merry "Day that the only thing open are delis, chinese food restaurants, and movie theaters" Day. And as Jon Stewart noted on "The Daily Show," don't forget to spend December 25th, the only federal religious holiday, reflecting on the true meaning of Separation of Church and State.

Just a quick note...

2005-12-18T05:34:00.000-05:00

I've started a fiction blog over at http://jfishfiction.blogspot.com where I'll be posting new and old works of original fiction every now and then. I decided it was way easier to update a blog than to post new fiction on my website, so this is where I'm gonna put it from now on. Anyway, we now return to our regularly scheduled programs.

~Peace

Big Brother is Watching

2005-12-17T18:48:00.000-05:00

Been awhile since I've posted, mainly because the last thing I wanna think about on my break is politics. But anyway...

Bush Admits To Spying on Americans

Not only does he admit it, he says its the best for the country. Right. That's it. You know what else is best for the country? I dunno, perhaps respect for the rights and freedoms guaranteed in the constitution. I could have sword this was a constitutional democracy, not a totalitarian autocracy. Silly me.

Susan Low Bloch, a professor of constitutional law at Georgetown University Law Center, said Bush was "taking a hugely expansive interpretation of the Constitution and the president's powers under the Constitution."

"I didn't hear him specify any legal right, except his right as president, which in a democracy doesn't make much sense."

Here's my favorite part:

The president had harsh words for those who revealed the program to the media, saying they acted improperly and illegally. The surveillance was first disclosed in Friday's New York Times.
"As a result, our enemies have learned information they should not have," Bush said. "The unauthorized disclosure of this effort damages our national security and puts our citizens at risk."

I wonder who these enemies could be...wasn't Nixon impeached for spying on his enemies too? Hrm...

More political quizzes

2005-11-29T12:15:00.000-05:00

You are a
Social Liberal
(86% permissive)

and an...
Economic Liberal
(10% permissive)

You are best described as a:

Democratic Socialist

Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid
Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

Ya know, I may disagree with the word they chose to use to describe my classification, but I'm okay with being likened to Martin Luther King Jr. and Bono. If Ghandi is a socialist, then so am I!

Via fellow columnist Sarah Pevey over at General Pevey's Empire

I've taken some other political quizzes. You can see them here if you want. Otherwise, peace out yo.

Another Republican indicted?!?

2005-11-29T00:36:00.000-05:00

Rep. Randy "Duke" Cunningham (R-CA) pleads guilty to taking bribes, mail fraud, wire fraud, and tax evasion.

It never ends...

First DeLay, then Libby, with Rove and Frist waiting in the wings. Now Cunningham is out, too. I've always said "business ethics" was an oxymoron. Now it's starting to look like "Conservative morality" is too.

Just how much does Bush hate the media?

2005-11-27T06:49:00.000-05:00

Did Bush seriously consider bombing al-Jazeera? - CNN

At least one british newspaper seems to think so, and the rest of the international news agencies are starting to wonder as well.

A six page internal memo leaked to the press describes British Prime Minister Tony Blair having to talk George W. Bush out of bombing al-Jazeera, the Saudi based news agency equivicable to CNN.

There is no way of knowing whether or not the memo is factual, but there are some startling facts that suggest that it is. The primary indicator is the British government threatening British news agencies with prosecution for violating national security press laws if they report on the memo any farther.

Bush has never had anyhting nice to say about al-Jazeera because they show the things that American news agencies won't, such as the videos of Osama bin Laden and Omar al-Zarqari as well as becoming infamous worldwide for airing some of the beheading videos uncensored.

But Bush's main problem with al-Jazeera is that they don't have to toe the lines he has placed on American and British journalists because they are welcomed into the countries they report in, including Iraq. They can show whatever they want, and they are the only news agency that regularly shows how unpopular the war is over there. They have also used their editorial time to regularly lambast his administration and his war. I applaud them for that, but he derides them for the same reason, and has gone on record as such, calling them "terrorists without guns."

There is no way to know if this story is true. Even if it is, there's no way of telling whether or not this statement might have been in the context of a joke. But if it is a joke, it is a tastless one.

Both field headquarters of al-Jazeera in Afganistan and Iraq were bombed by American air strikes, supposedly by accident, though the Bush administration has patently refused to initiate an investigation on either incident. But more importantly is the fact that journalists, i.e. civilians, are being targeted across the middle east by terrorists simply because of their jobs, especially in Iraq.

Now, I don't kid myself into thinking I'm a journalist. I've never taken a journalism course, and I tried my hand at newswriting only to find it incredibly taxing and bitter tasting in my mouth. Those that can do it with ease have my respect simply because I cannot do it. I'm a columnist, an opinion and rhtetoric writer for a university newspaper, and occasionally I write an essay or speak for some smaller groups on issues of politics and society. But I can't help but feel a sense of kinship with the people that go out there into the crossfire risking career, health, and even their lives to bring the truth to light. I would be nothing without the information they provide, because all I do is comment on it. They bring it to us.

Journalists are people, not statistics. They are mothers, fathers, brothers, daughters, and cousins performing a job as essiential to modern society as teachers, custodians, and computer programmers. They give to charity. They believe in God. They are just like you and I, Mr. Bush.
They are not the butt-ends of very bad jokes.

And God help you if you were serious. Because that makes you more of a terrorist than they ever could be.

Bush's Bombing List

2005-11-27T05:40:00.000-05:00

Hat tip to Jesus' General

Tomorrow, Bob Woodward will reveal the following list of things Our Leader wants to bomb after he bombs Al Jazeera.

1. Spongebob Squarepants's pineapple under the sea.
2. Breathalizer Inc's corporate offices
3. Those Chinese doors
4. Sy Hersh's notebook
5. His Bicycle
6. Utz Pretzels
7. The bastard who gave Condi herpes
8. Websters Dictionary
9. A great big frog
10. Karl's mighty spatula of presidential discipline

I'd like to add the folowing to the list:

11. Whoever publised "My Pet Goat."
12. Whoever headed the search committee to nominate Harriet Meirs to the Supreme Court.

~Peace

On Vacation

2005-11-17T19:33:00.000-05:00

Hey Everyone,

This is just a reminder, but I'm going to Rome, Italy from Friday, November 19 to Sunday, November 27. There will be columns, but probably no website or blog updates. If you write me I may or may not respond during this time, but I will get back to you eventually I promise. Otherwise, peace out and have a great Thanksgiving everyone!

~Peace
Jon

PS Save some turkey for me. I don't think they celebrate the founding of Plymouth over there...

No I WILL NOT Condemn Them!

2005-11-16T21:34:00.000-05:00

So stop asking. No more e-mails. No more facebook messages. No more IMs. Well actually, keep 'em coming cause I love getting 'em, but just don't ask me if I think what they did was wrong, because I don't.

The protesters that snuck inside the Baker presentation and shouted chants and pulled out the massive banner did nothing wrong. It may have been somewhat disrespectful to Baker, but, having been a leader in ousting Nixon, Baker should more than understand where we're coming from. if only there was a republican in congress now that had the guts to ask the questions Baker asked during the Nixon investigations.

I Made National News

2005-11-15T15:10:00.000-05:00

Cheney Heckled by Anti-War Protesters - Associated Press / CNN

Well okay, it wasn't just me and it's not like I was mentioned by name or anything, but I was there damn it! We had some great chants going and there were probably close to a hundred of us there. Those that got inside with the banner have my utmost respect, cuase that took guts.

UPDATE: More Press

Protesters Rally, Inside and Out - Knoxville News Sentinel

Vice-President Dick Cheney speaks in Knoxville - WBIR Channel 10

VIDEO
WATE Video Links - Click the second video
Video of Cheney's remarks. You can hear the protesters start to chant at around 3:30. I wasn't with them inside, but they made the news.

Pat Robertson Condemns town To Hell

2005-11-11T17:13:00.000-05:00

He's a nutbag, I'm here to tell ya.

Robertson warns PA town of disaster

Because they "voted God out of your city," Pat Robertson believes that the town of Dover, PA is headed straight to hell.

The Dover School Board had been considering allowing Intelligent Design to be taught beside evolution in schools. Earlier this week, every single member that supported ID was defeated in their reelection bids. According to Pat Robertson, this isn't democracy at work, but rather the damnation of an entire town.

"I'd like to say to the good citizens of Dover: If there is a disaster in your area, don't turn to God. You just rejected him from your city...God is tolerant and loving, but we can't keep sticking our finger in his eye forever...If they have future problems in Dover, I recommend they call on Charles Darwin. Maybe he can help them."

Funny, I'm pretty sure God can't be voted out of anywere. Furthermore, I'm prety sure the voters are merely making a statement about good science versus bad philosophy taught as science.

Also, I could have sworn that I read somewhere that God wasn't vengeful...and that he had unending patience. I can't remember where I read that. Some book these four dude's wrote, oh what's their names...Matt, Mark, Luke, and John I think. Sigh...the book title escapes me, but its a pretty good read. Maybe Pat Robertson should pick it up sometime.

Tragedy in Campbell County

2005-11-08T18:06:00.000-05:00

Shooting in Campbell County High School

http://www.wbir.com/news/news.aspx?storyid=29978

As I write this, one assistant principal is dead and another assistant and the principal are in critical condition. The assailant was a fourteen year old high school freshman.

Pray for the students, teachers and families.

Electroshock not covered by my HMO

2005-11-07T20:36:00.000-05:00

John Carruthers is a funny, funny man.

We Love Our Columnists

No matter how often we disagree with them, we love our staff columnists. Be they insanely conservative or outrageously liberal, we respect all viewpoints because we are the world and all that crap.

Given the broad array of issues they discuss, we expect and receive a good amount of letters to the editor. Some of them are marriage proposals, and some call for the medieval torture of certain columnists.

We love the letters as well (we’re full of love and liquor today), because we enjoy feedback, and it gets us out of writing editorials.

But please, if you don’t like them, keep it somewhat respectable. For example:
Good: “While he may have some facts behind him, it’s important to look at the big picture.”
Bad: “He sucks; his mother is a mule and he should be beaten daily with a short length of pipe. GO VOLS!!!!1”

So keep the letters coming. But keep in mind that we’re not going to give Jon Fish electroshock therapy, throw Chris Hedgepeth in a well or smack Patrick Christiana in the back of the head “’til he gets him some damn sense.” OK, maybe the last one.

I was in the office today and happened to catch John there. He informed me that the Beacon would not pay for my electroshock treatments. Sigh...

I dunno about marriage proposals, but I have gotten the occasional offer for anonymous sex between classes. I usually respectfully decline, mainly because there's no way to know for sure if that's a woman on the other side or not.

Ah well.

Patrick Christiana's Political Affiliation Quiz

2005-11-02T13:13:00.000-05:00

Patrick Christiana is the best political humor columnist the Beacon has ever had. Anyway, he offered up a quiz to help people determine their political affiliation. You can view it here. Anyway, here's my answers:

Part one. Please answer yes or no.
No. 1. Do you wear Birkenstocks?
no

No. 2. Have you ever been to a monster truck rally?
no

No. 3. Do you own a Che Guevara T-shirt?
no, but I would probabyl be okay with wearing one

No. 4. If a woodchuck could chuck wood, would that make it an environmental hazard?
probably not, unless an endangered species was hit by the falling tree

No. 5. Have you ever burned a Dixie Chicks album?
What would that solve? I propose burning the Dixie Chicks themselves.

No. 6. Do you eat tofu?
Ew...

No. 7. If a tree falls in the woods and it hits Ann Coulter, do you care?
Well, I would be depressed because I would be forced to be original instead of having someone like her to make fun of in my columns. On the other hand, if she were to be killed, I could always change targets to Chris Hedgepeth. He's just about as bad.

No. 8. Have you ever purchased a fish taco?
Is that a euphamism for buying a prostitute?

No. 9. Does anyone still like Madonna?
Well, she is the mother og Jesus...

No. 10. Do these pants make me look fat?
Those don't, but the polka-dotted spandex you wore to The Carousel was just wrong.

Great job! Give yourself ten points for getting this far. Unless you said I look fat, then you only get five points.

Part two. Circle one.
No. 11. Larger hurricanes are the result of (a) Global Warming (b) the Wrath of God
Global Warming is caused by the Wrath of God. Duh.

No. 12. If I had to chose, I would drive (a) a tractor (b) a golf cart (c) the General Lee

No. 13. These bones in the ground, they belong to (a) dinosaurs (b) dragons

Satan put dinosaur bones there to confuse us!

No. 14. I find the fact that Bill O’Reilly sexually harassed a co-worker (a) upsetting, he has important things to say (b) vindicating, he’s a real jerk (c) irrelevant (d) arousing

Those tapes were hawt...

No. 15. My favorite movie is (a) “Fahrenheit 9/11” (b) “Pearl Harbor” (c) “A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors”

Dream warriors!!!

No. 16. For Halloween, I thought I would scare people by dressing as (a) a terrorist (b) a French person (c) cyborg Dick Cheney (d) President Hillary Clinton

President Ann Coulter!

No. 17. I think guns (a) are great, we need more, yee-haw (b) should only be used to abort babies (c) I have shot myself in the foot and cannot finish this questionnaire

Should only be used to abort baby puppies.

No. 18. I would love to deny having sexual relations with (a) Jenna Bush (b) Vanessa Kerry (c) Nancy Reagan

Any chance I can hook up a Jenna Bush/Vanessa Kerry 3-way?

No. 19. In your dreams, (a) Bill Clinton is dictator for life (b) George Bush is your significant other/life partner (c) everyone is Christian (d) you are the Wizard Master

I don't have to dream to be the Wizard Master.

No. 20. When the Vols lose a football game, I tend to (a) cry and drink until I pass out (b) write geeky letters into the Beacon (c) be thankful that I bet they wouldn’t cover the spread (d) I only watch figure skating

Who are the vols?

No. 21. I think that President Bush’s speeches are (a) inspiring (b) infuriating (c) hilarious (d) arousing

Unlike Bill O'Reilley, I don't touch myself when George Bush speaks.

No. 22. I find former comedian turned political satirist Janeane Garofalo to be (a) unfunny (b) annoying (c) insufferable (d) I think you are using the term “comedian” a little too loosely

Um...D

No. 23. California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger (a) is an evil Republican (b) is an evil Democrat pretending to be a Republican (c) was great in “Last Action Hero” and should get to grope all the women he wants

I loved Last Action Hero! Grope away Mr. S.!

No. 24. To me, gay marriage is (a) a constitutional right (b) a sin in the eyes of God (c) way hot when it involves two chicks

Hawt.

No. 25. If there is one thing I hate, it is (a) George Bush (b) Bill Clinton (c) France (d) America (e) War (f) Peace (g) Wal-Mart (h) Sean Penn (i) sarcastic columnists (j) when your roommate puts his feet up on the sink and cuts his toenails

Sarcastic columnists piss me off.

No. 26. You are deep in the Mountain King’s lair. The orcs are closing in on you and you are out of magic arrows. There is a tunnel to your left. A rope hangs in front of you. What will you do?

I went down the tunnel, but you forgot about my +3 dagger of Minotaur slaying :p

Mwahahaha!

And there was much rejoicing...Part II

2005-10-28T15:55:00.000-04:00

Vice-President's Chief of Staff Lewis Libby indicted on charges of Perjury, Conspiracy, and Obstruction of Justice; could face up to 30 years in prison.

Haaaaaleluja!
Haaaaaleluja!
Halleluja!
Halleluja!
Halle e luja!

And we didn't even have to eat Sir Robin's minstrels. Oh, don't worry Karl Rove, you're next big boy.

Rove not indicted...yet

And there was much rejoicing...

2005-10-27T23:39:00.000-04:00

Yay!!!

http://apnews.myway.com/article/20051027/D8DGL0103.html

Harriet Meirs takes one for the neocon team. Good for her.

Jack Thompson: Asshat

2005-10-12T20:48:00.000-04:00

http://gc.advancedmn.com/article.php?artid=5883

World class douchebag.

For thost that don't know, Jack Thompson is a lawyer that tries to blame voilence in kids solely on video games. Movies, no. Television, huh uh. Parents who let the entertainment industry raise their children? Nope. It's all video games fault.

Good logic.

The YHWH Made Me Do It

2005-10-06T16:28:00.000-04:00

God told me to invade Iraq, Bush tells Palistinian leaders

That's right, George W. Bush claims that he communes with God:

'I'm driven with a mission from God. God would tell me, "George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan." And I did, and then God would tell me, "George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq …" And I did. And now, again, I feel God's words coming to me, "Go get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security, and get peace in the Middle East." And by God I'm gonna do it.'

I wonder, George; did a voice tell you to do it? Did you hear it? Or was it a compulsion you felt as you glossed over the whole "Thou Shalt Not Kill" thing in the Bible.

Get your president now in two flavors, original flavor Idiot, and now Extra Tasty Nutbag.

Judge...who? Part II

2005-10-03T21:39:00.000-04:00

Dear God why doesn't he just nominate Michael Brown? He's just about as qualified. I mean he did help judge horse shows after all.

Bush picks White House counsel for Supreme Court

An Open Letter to Tennessee State Representative Stacey Campfield

2005-09-25T23:18:00.000-04:00

Hello Mr. Campfield,

This is Jon Fish. You may remember me as the person that asked you why you wanted to regulate opinion in public universities and you, in turn, accused me of using drugs. Or maybe you remember me as the guy that took said e-mail correspondences and published them in one of the largest newspapers in Knoxville. You probably saw it in one of the hundreds of comments you deleted which linked to it on your blog.

Anyway, as you're back in the news, I decided to sieze the opportunity to berate you mercilessly and further destroy your career by writing yet another piece about you. So I have some questions which I hope you will respond to in the same arrogant yet incompetent tone that you have now become more than famous for with the 100,000 people that have visited the page where I posted your previous letters:

1. Why do you want to join the Black Caucus?
Follow Up: Is it just pure narcissism?
Second follow up: Did you know what narcissism means, or did you have to look it up?

2. Has it been difficult to maintain balance on that pedistal with your giant ego?

3. What would you do if you were allowed to join the Black Caucus? Would you actually go? Or would you merely bow out because they wouldn't play your self-agrandizing game you shallow, self-important wannabe pseudo-martyr?

4. I have an application pending with the Republican National Committee, could you throw some influence my way? They seem to be mad that I want to join considering I'm not a Reuplican.
Follow up: How is this any different from you not being allowed to join the Black Caucus? Are they discriminating against liberals?

5. Same question, except regarding the Christian Coalition. I'm not a Christian so they take offense at the insinuation that I think I should have a voice in a group that believes in pretty much the exact opposite of everything I do.
Follow Up: How is this any different from you not being allowed to join the Black Caucus? Are they discriminating against non-Christians (a not all too uncommon occurrence from the right)?

6. Can I work on your campaign next year?
Follow Up: If not, why?
Second Follow Up: How is this any different from you not being allowed to join the Black Caucus? Are you discriminating against people who actively seek to destroy your political career?

7. What will you do when you don't even get the Republican nomination next year because no self-aware conservative with any hope of keeping the seat in Republican hands will support you anymore?

Anyway, feel free to respond at your leisure and have a good day. Thank you for bringing both dignity and sanity to politics in this country.

Jon Fish
Editorial Columnist
The Daily Beacon

Stacey Campfield is at it again...

2005-09-25T02:16:00.000-04:00

White lawmaker, Black Caucus at odds

Yes that's right folks, white narcissistic State Rep. Stacey Campfield of Koxville's 19th district wants to join the Black Caucus.

Personally I say they should let him. If he goes he can hear about why he's a hypocritical moron at every meeting, and if he doesn't then he just looks like jackass (well, moreso than usual).

Let's make him a deal: he can join the Black Caucus if I can join the Southern Baptist Convention. Not being a Chrisitan, I think it's important that I get a voice in something that is absolutely contradictory to my views.

Ugh...what an idiot.

Thanks to Egalia over at Tennessee Guerilla Women for the heads up.

Thank You John Kerry

2005-09-19T17:07:00.000-04:00

The Flood Continues...

"Natural and human calamity have stripped away the spin machine, creating a rare accountability moment, not just for the Bush administration, but for all of us to take stock of the direction of our country and do what we can to reverse it. That's our job -- to turn this moment from a frenzied expression of guilt into a national reversal of direction.
We've seen America at its best and our government at its worst. Millions of Americans are beginning to realize where they fit in our democracy under Republican governance: nowhere."

"Katrina is a symbol of all this administration does and doesn't do. Michael Brown -- or Brownie as the President so famously thanked him for doing a heck of a job -- Brownie is to Katrina what Paul Bremer is to peace in Iraq; what George Tenet is to slam dunk intelligence; what Paul Wolfowitz is to parades paved with flowers in Baghdad; what Dick Cheney is to visionary energy policy; what Donald Rumsfeld is to basic war planning; what Tom Delay is to ethics; and what George Bush is to "Mission Accomplished" and "Wanted Dead or Alive." The bottom line is simple: the "we'll do whatever it takes" administration doesn't have what it takes to get the job done.
This is the Katrina administration."

"This is the real test of Katrina. Will we be satisfied to only do the immediate: care for the victims and rebuild the city? Or will we be inspired to tackle the incompetence that left us so unprepared, and the societal injustice that left so many of the least fortunate waiting and praying on those rooftops? "

"Today, let’s you and I acknowledge what’s really going on in this country. The truth is that this week, as a result of Katrina, many children languishing in shelters are getting vaccinations for the first time. Thousands of adults are seeing a doctor after going without a check-up for years. Illnesses lingering long before Katrina will be treated by a healthcare system that just weeks ago was indifferent, and will soon be indifferent again."

"The rush now to camouflage their misjudgments and inaction with money does not mean they are suddenly listening. It's still politics as usual. The plan they're designing for the Gulf Coast turns the region into a vast laboratory for right wing ideological experiments. They're already talking about private school vouchers, abandonment of environmental regulations, abolition of wage standards, subsidies for big industries, and believe it or not yet another big round of tax cuts for the wealthiest among us! "

"On the line is a fundamental choice. A choice between a view that says “you’re on your own,” “go it alone,” or “every man for himself.” Or a different view - a different philosophy - a different conviction of governance - a belief that says our great American challenge is one of shared endeavor and shared sacrifice."

Our challenge...[is] to speak out so loudly that Washington has no choice but to make choices worthy of this great country.

-Senator John Kerry, in speech at Brown University, 19 September 2005
Transctipt

Amen.

By the way, I had no idea this or Bill Clinton's remarks were coming when I wrote my column for this week. Both came out after my deadline, Sunday, so I guess for a lowly college student to see the exact same problems as a standing senator and a former president before their views are made public really shines a light on how obvious the problems with this administration on poverty, debt, economics, and their priorities really are.

Not to be narcissistic, but my psychic powers are proving to be much stronger than anticipated. Kerry comes very close to calling for impeachment in this speech, and though he can't get it with this congress, there's 33 senate seats up for grabs in 12 months. Let's keep our fingers crossed.

Thank You Bill Clinton

2005-09-19T00:28:00.001-04:00

"What Americans need to understand is that ... every single day of the year, our government goes into the market and borrows money from other countries to finance Iraq, Afganistan, Katrina, and our tax cuts...We depend on Japan, China, the United Kingdom, Saudi Arabia, and Korea primarily to basically loan us money every day of the year to cover my tax cut and these conflicts and Katrina. I don't think it makes any sense." -Bill Clinton, Sunday, 19 September 2005

Clinton is referring to the skyrocketing defecit, which was the largest surplus in history when he left office. Frivilous war and now absolutely horrible planning threatens to make the US Economy completely untenable, and Republicans still want to cut taxes while Katrina threatens to double the defecit, which is already larger than the defecit has ever been.

Oh, by the way, Senator Bill Frist is championing a resolution to abolish the Estate Tax, which affects only the wealthiest 1% of the country yet woulc cost the government over $70 billion. Presidnet Bush is very in favor of this bill. Considering that Katrina threatens to cost use more than $100 billion, I think that this owuld jsut be one step closer to crippling the economy. Meanwhile, the wealthy elite continue to bare the lightest tax burden while we, the middle class, continue to suffer from the extravagance of the government and the elite class.

I urge you to write Mr. Frist and let him know how you feel about this.

Sigh...I just can't help but wonder if these people have ever cracked open a history book. Untenable finances, overwhelming foreign debt, a hedonistic upper class not paying their fair share, the forcing of the financial debt on the poor and middle class...This is beginning to look an awful lot like what caused the French Revolution.

I'm all about change, but I like my head where it is, thank you.

Taxes hurt the victims?

2005-09-15T17:23:00.000-04:00

"One of the worst things we could do to our economy right now is raise taxes. It would particularly hit the people who have been affected by this hurricane hard." -Scott McClellan, White House Press Secretary

What?! How does raising taxes affect the people who have nothing? It doesn't make goddam sense. Raising taxes would take from the people who currently are recieving incomes, not take from people without incomes. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my entire life, and further solidifies impressions of how economic conservatives will lie to protect the wealthy.

It's official: I'm Psychic. And it makes me sad when I predict the future...

2005-09-08T23:16:00.000-04:00

http://dailybeacon.utk.edu/showarticle.php?articleid=48295

Chief Justice Rhenquist dies less than ten days after I predict that Bush will probably get two Supreme Court nominations. And I die a little inside...

Time to put my new psychic powers to the test:

My next prediction is that George W. Bush will be impeached for his treacherous actions of involving us in a war based on lies, his abhorrent mismanagement of the hurricane, driving our country into a calamatous debt for private corporate gains, and his myriad of other failures to the people of the United States.

Evolution and religion are NOT opposed

2005-09-02T22:16:00.000-04:00

I don't even know why we have to have this discussion, but apparently we do, so I'm going to try to get through this as quickly as humanly possible.

Evolution and religion are in no way opposed to each other. "Believeing" in evolution does not in any way reject anything laid out in the bible nor does it render one a non-Christian.

First, lets deal with the claim that evolution is a "theory". Evolution is a theory in the same way gravity is a theory. It has been tested innumerable times and irrefutable evidence of it's function has been garnered from a myriad of observations.

Intelligent Design, Creationism, or whatever else you want to call it (Flying Spaghetti Monsterism...), on the other hand is bad science at best, and bad theology at worst. It has no ability to stand up to scientific scrutiny, hence why it's proponents appeal to the masses instead of the scientific community to sew the seeds of their beliefs, because they know it cannot be supported scientifically (don't believe me? Check out this article describing a leaked memo from the Discovery Institute, which heads up the Intelligent Design movement, in which ID leaders talk about their strategy to mislead the public by knowingly applying false logic to confuse people not well-versed in evolutionary theory).

But this shouldn't even be the issue. Is it really so hard to believe that God is the driving force behind evolution? Evolution is a theory based upon as strict set of physical and natural laws. ID requires that carbon dating not work. It requires God to put dinosaur bones inside the earth and to falsify the geological record so that it indicates the earth is 4.6 billion years old instead of less than 10,000 as ID claims. Then fails to explain why He gave creatures that have lived inside caves for longer than Creationists say the earth has existed functionless eyes or why He gave humans tailbones, appendixes, and pinky toes.

Is it really so hard to accept that the universe may not have been created in 6 days? Is it really so hard to accept that humanity could not conceptualize billions of years or the evolutionary process when the Creation was written? Is it really so hard to believe that the six day creation is an allegory to show simply that humanity is God's favoered creation?

I've talked a lot before about how much of the bible is flat out false and can be disproven both historically scientifically (see The Da Vinci Code on Christianity for a few examples. Thank God Dan Brown brought mainstream attention to some of the inconsistencies that religious scholars and, well anyone that actually read their bibles, have known for centuries). I've been saying this stuff for years, not to say that the bible is false, but merely that it cannot be taken literally because people, being fallable, flawed creatures, make mistakes, and some of them even have ulterior motives to decieve would-be believers.

In closing, I want you to ask yourself a couple questions. In the bible, God calls Himself "Law" and "Order". Which theory sounds lawful and ordered to you? The one based upon the natural laws upon which it can be proven that the universe functions, or the one that requires God to lie and decieve us, whom he calls "his most favored creation?"

I sure hope it isn't the latter.

Thinker's Anonymous

2005-08-31T20:51:00.000-04:00

Recieved this in the mail from my friend Brian today. Couldn't help but be amused.

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then-- to loosen up. Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I had turned offthe TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother's.

I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"One day the boss called me in. He said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don'tstop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job." This gave mea lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..." "I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!" "But Honey, surely it's not that serious." "It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won't have any money!" "That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently. She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama."I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door.

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors...They didn't open. The library was closed. To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.

As I sank to the ground, clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard Thinker's Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.

I never miss a TA meeting. At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me. Today, I joined the Republican Party.

How very, very true.

Pat Robertson: King of the Lunatics

2005-08-23T13:07:00.000-04:00

If this doesn't go a long way to prove how insane right-wing Christians are, then I give up:

NYT - Robetson is Pilloried for Assassination Call

"We are the most powerful nation in the world, and if you disagree with us you deserve a bullet in the back of the head!" Signed, the Reverend Pat Robertson.

I only wish I could have seen it first hand (but then I'd have to watch the 700 club...and my tolerance for pain is not nearly high enough). What a nutbag.

Camping on the Second White House's Lawn

2005-08-17T21:09:00.000-04:00

I dunno how to feel about Cindy Sheehan.

I never understood her motivations. She decides to act arguably like a crazy person and camp in front of Bush's Crawford ranch while he's on vacation until he agrees to meet with her (At least I think that's the story. There's so many versions of it I can't keep 'em straight.)

I say crazy, because she is but one of thousands of Americans who have lost loved ones, yet she was the only one who actually went to such an extreme. However, she may not be crazy at all; she may be a genius.

She's garnered amazing amounts of support and media attention. The major news outlets are reporting on her activities every single day. Followers are flocking to Crawford to rally by her side (as are opponents). It's really become quite an amazing show.

I was worried at first that she was going to make those of us that were against the war look like emotional, illogical nightmares, but theres an amazing logic in her actions. She started off as a woman on a mission, andn ow she's leading a following of people determined to get America out of Iraq (what I think about that is another topic entirely). And she's garnered nothing but sympathy. All she originally wanted was a meeting, fifteen minutes of the President's time, and now she is arguably the most powerful anti-war force in the US.

In addition, her rhetoric has become increasingly abrasive. Originally, she just wanted an explanation. Now she's saying everything that we all wish we could say into a microphone and blast it to millions of news watchers across the world. Even today she said what I've been dancing around for years: "George W. Bush is the number one terrorist in the world."

Sheehan is exemplifying true passion. She's showing the world just how divided we are in the US. Did anyone camp out front of the White House over the Whitewater or Lewinski "scandals"? Or Iraq 1? This is Viet Nam level vitriol. Half of this country hates George W. Bush. They absolutely despise him and think the world would be a better place without him. Did the number of people who hated Clinton or Bush 1 or Reagan or Carter...all the way back to Nixon hate their President as much as Bush 2 is hated?

Not even close.

Regardless of whether you like him or hate him, you have to admit that the level of hatred is far greater than any other president in recent history. Sheehan's demonstrations just add the proverbial exclamation point to the irrefutable fact that George W. Bush and his allies in the executive branch, congress, and constitutents are single-handedly tearing this country apart.

"Uniter not a divider" my ass.

Liberal or Conservative

2005-08-13T03:24:00.000-04:00

I just took this quiz, thought it was appropriate.

Your Political Profile

Overall: 20% Conservative, 80% Liberal

Social Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

Personal Responsibility: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal

Fiscal Issues: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Ethics: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal

Defense and Crime: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal

How Liberal / Conservative Are You?

That's about where I expected it to fall honestly, though some of you probably expected 100% liberal. I'll explain. I answered that people should be allowed to own a gun because I believe that, but there wasn't a question about what TYPE of guns they should be able to own. I also answered that the death penalty is okay because I don't particularly care. I guess if you did something bad enough to warrant it you should be made to suffer life in prison instead, but really just can't care one way or the other. I also said it's okay to go against the rest of the world to go to war if necessary, but I also said the Iraq war was totally unjustified. I justify this because a country with virtually legalized slavery is on the human rights committee in the UN, so international law is muddled at best in my opinion. I scored perfect where it mattered: ethics and finance.

I also did this one:

You Are a Liberal for Life

You've got a bleeding heart - and you're proud of it.

For you, liberal means being compassionate, pro-government, and anti-business.

You believe in equality for every person, and you consider yourself universally empathetic.

Helping others is not just political for you ... it's very personal too.

What political persuasion are you?

Pretty accurate I'd say.

And this one:

You Are 53% American

Most times you are proud to be an American.
Though sometimes the good ole US of A makes you cringe
Still, you know there's no place better suited to be your home.
You love your freedom and no one's going to take it away from you!

How American Are You?

Again, pretty accurate. Dunno bout the percentage, thought it might be higher, but the description is dead on.

Sorry, just happened upon this website with blog tools. Kinda cool.

Peace and goodnight everyone.

Well, it's official

2005-08-13T02:59:00.000-04:00

It's official folks.

I will again be taking up the reigns of political and social issues columnist for The Daily Beacon. My columns will be appearing every Tuesday beginning August 30th.You can read my past works on The Beacon's website or on my own at <http//web.utk.edu/~jfish>

Thanks to Daily Beacon Editor-in-Chief John Carruthers and congratulations to the other columnists selected this fall:

-Will Hamilton
-Crystal Humphrey
-Daniel Ferguson
-Nate Arthur
-Scott Hendrix
-Patrick Christiana
-Lisa Schol
-Kristin Luna
-Megan Williams
-Jeff Cohran
-Sarah Pevey
-Steven Brooks
-Weslie Jarvis

Over half these guys are relatively new to Page 4, and aside from Nate, Kristin, Megan, and Jeff, I've not seen any of their work before. Graduation left some pretty big holes to fill, including my perennial opponent and friend John Brown. However, according to our editor the competition for Columnist slots was much more fierce than it has been in past years, so the work of the newcomers must be of a superior quality, as evidenced by some previous columnists not selected to return this season. I expect that we'll be a great team and together bring the University of Tennessee an informative and interesting Opinion Page for the fall.

Congratulations and good luck everyone!

Maybe he'll go to work for the postal service...

2005-08-11T23:50:00.000-04:00

I was surfing around reading various news stories when I happened upon a story about the two kids who killed four girls and a teacher in 1998 outside their school.

The thirteen year old involved was being released from juvenile incarceration because he had been convicted as a minor could only be held until he turned twenty-one. I guess that's just the way the world works, I suppose, but then I got to this paragraph:

"It has also drawn a sharp reaction from gun control campaigners, who criticised the fact that because Johnson was convicted as a minor his criminal record will be wiped clean and he will be allowed to buy a gun."
(http://www.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,,1547686,00.html)

That's just irony at it's finest. I wonder if this was one of those noble efforts gun control opponents talk about when they go out to take down deer with their MP-5s.

US News Calls Russian Gov't Terrorists - AKA I was Right!

2005-08-02T13:42:00.000-04:00

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/4732783.stm

So ABC calls the Russian govenment terrorists, but they wouldn't dare say anything about what America has been doing in the Middle East (or South America, or Southeast Asia, etc.).

Not too long ago, I wrote a column about something very similar...hrm...

http://dailybeacon.utk.edu/showarticle.php?articleid=16109

It's funny how the best news source available in America is the British Brodcasting Corperation. Well, that or a public university newspaper.

I should win a Peabody or something.

Dr./Sen. Bill Frist is in a persistent vegetative state

2005-07-29T17:09:00.000-04:00

At least he must be, because every single stance he takes on a medical or scientific issue makes him look like a complete and absolute idiot.

Over the winter, Dr/Sen Frist, in supporting President Bush's plan for funding sexual education programs developed by ultraconservative education groups (some of which contained claims like "Mutual masturbation without intercourse can result in pregnancy"), basically came out and said that he believed that AIDS can be spread via contact with sweat and tears.

SWEAT AND TEARS?!?!? Yeah, and the earth was created in 144 hours.

Then in March, he sponsored a bill to allow congress to intervene in the Terri Schivo case (because, since congress only seems to cause problems for the entire population, they decided to start passing bills on a person to person basis). Then, in an unprecidented show of stupidity, he said, after having no actual contact with Ms. Schivo whatsoever andonly having seen a couple hours of video tape and BY HIS OWN ADMISSION did not read ANY of her medical reports, said he didn't think she was in a persistent vegetative state...

Of course, a month after she died and the autopsy was performed, it was revealed that her brain had shrunk to about half its original size, that she was blind, and that, of course, she had been in a persistent vegetative state for several years...

Now, today, he has gone before the Senate in a dramatic reversal, in support of Stem Cell Research, causing a major rift in the GOP and turning against President Bush on the issue.

First, don't get me wrong, I couldn't be happier with his reversal. We need to be persuing widespread Stem Cell Research to cure debilitating diseases like alzheimers and other degenerative disorders. However, I feel the need to point out how idiotic his logic is.

Let's look at some quotes from his speech today:

"I am pro-life...I believe that human life begins at conception."
-Okay, so in his mind, when a sperm and an egg combine, a human life is created.

"I also believe that embryonic stem cell research should be encouraged and supported."
-...okay, so even though a fertilized egg is a life (Again, in his mind. This isn't necessarily what I think.) it is okay to murder these people to harvest stem cells from them.

So Bill Frist wants us to legalize what he considers murder.

Now I don't really believe that's what he thinks. I think he's just stupid; as if the AIDS and the Terri Schivo things didn't do enough to prove it.

Why did God make his most ardent supporters so dumb? Maybe it's just further evidence that God doesn't agree with them.

You're killing me Sandra

2005-07-22T00:04:00.000-04:00

What the hell are you trying to do O'Conner?

Even if Rheinquist doesn't retire, he doesn't have 2 years left in him. He will very likely die before the end of Bush's term, and you just decide to go ahead and get out? You'r giving the mose horrendous ideologue of a president we've ever had not one, but TWO justice spots to fill?

What the hell are you thinking?!?

Couldn't you have stuck it out for 2 more years?

And now he's going to replace you, one of two women, with another white man.

Your logic escapes me, Sandra. I'm really disappointed.

Judge...who?

2005-07-21T23:49:00.000-04:00

Judge Roberts...who the hell is Judge Roberts?

Well, apparently he's Bush's nomination for Sandra Day O'Conner's spot on the Supreme Court.

I've never even heard of this guy.

I don't know if this is a good thing or not. On the one hand, he hasn't said anything that's been published on the front page of any newspapers in his career. However, it does make one wonder how someone could rise high enough to get a Supreme Court nod without ever having made any ripples in the water.

I'm also a little concerned about his past, especially sicne we know so little about him. I do know that he has only been a judge for two years. That seems like hardly enough experience to be a Supreme Court Justice. Furthermore, he was nominated in 2001 to the Federal Appeals Court, but was rejected outright. Then in 2003 he gets in with a voice vote. That doesn't make sense. How can he be unacceptable in 2001 and then get a free pass in 2003. What changed?

There's also the concern about his stance on particular issues, like abortion. Perosnally, I don't think he's extreme enough to try to overturn Roe v. Wade. What I'm more concerned with is his constructionist approach toward private business practices. He has basically argued that business should not be regulated by environmental standards whatsoever.

Can you even imagine what this country would look like if busineses could function without environmental regulation?

Anyway, as I think about it, he's probably okay. I knew I wasn't going to get anyone I'd like, but at least it's not someone I hate. The senate needs to grill him thoroughly just to make sure he won't try to overturn Roe v. Wade or overturn interpretive readings of the constitution already in place. I still don't know enough to make a vote yet, but I do know that bush could have done much, much worse.

If you say Karl Rove's name three times...

2005-07-21T23:21:00.000-04:00

...he manifests out of a screen of smoke and steals your soul.

We've known for a long time that he is actively trying to harm our government and our people, and now we finally have the proof.

Last week, it was reported in Newsweek that Karl Rove was the man that responsible for revealing undercover CIA agent Valerie Plame's identity.

The theory is that he did it as a way of getitng back at Ambassador Joseph Wilson, who was sent at the behest of the CIA to investigate the administration's claims that Iraq had tried to acquire Uranium from Africa. Wilson wrote a column saying that there was absolutely no evidence to support that claim, which was one of the major reasons cited for invading Iraq.

A few days later, Columnist and Douchebag of Liberty Robert Novak (thank you Jon Stewart) revealed that Wislon's wife, Valerie Plame, was actually an undercover CIA agent responsible for investigating WMD proliferation.

THIS IS A FEDERAL CRIME

Exposing undercover agents not only puts their lives in danger, but also anyone who associated with them or confided in them, not to ention destroying years of contact and information gathering.

So now, two years and a couple of jailed reporters later, the leak can finally be traced back to the lord of the underworld, Karl Rove. Everyone suspected it from day one, but now they can prove it.

What a bastard.

He's so mad about the disproving of the uranium claim that he would put dozens of peoples lives in danger and ruin years of work for his petty revenge? Well, I guess I shouldn't be surprised, they did start a war over petty revenge after all.

Well, petty revenge and oil, of course.

The beginning of the end...

2005-07-21T22:56:00.000-04:00

Well here it is.

I did my absolute best to resist starting a political blog, the state of our country combined with the incessant requests from others for me to do it, not to mention my own narcissism, I've broken down and did it.